The road... and its ways..

I run hard to dodge the two horid beasts that are chasing me. I cut a sharp right and stumble upon a wooden pew in the dark ally. The night is at its fullest bloom and death chasing me down in the moonlight as the rains drench me to the bone. I look behind to see if the beasts are still on my trail and to my horror the distance between them and me is shrinking by the second. I could sense the cold death nearing. Just a matter of few seconds and ill be done. Gasping for breath I run for my life. Heart pounding against my ribs and blood gushing every single vein in my body. The beasts are now about to make their final leap and just then.....

BEEP BEEP.... BEEP BEEP.... BEEP BEEP....

The Alarm clock showed 4:30 AM (Snooze/Dismiss)....

I wake up with bloodshot eyes to dismiss the alarm and lay on my bed thinking about the dream. With messed up hair I get out of my bed to the cold early morning breeze at the window to stare at the stars still twinkling bright in the night. The moon was nowhere in sight in the sky. I walked into the wash room to soak my face with cold water and get myself ready for the recording that begins at 6 AM sharp at Spectral Harmony.

"Ashwin was supposed to wake me up..." I pondered, as I searched for my cell to buzz him and wake him up incase he would still be dreaming the night away.

"Ashwin.... its me.. are you up dude...?"

"Yeah dude.. I was just gonna call you up.. but whatever.."

"5:30 at the station right....?"

"Yeah Mango.. Sharp at 5:30. Borivli Station. Dont be late yaar...!! Please.."

"No I wont. I'll make it before time. See you there"

I looked around in the empty room which was filled with silence and spotted my towel. I headed off for a shower and let cold water gush over me. The chill helped me shrug away all the lethargy and rocked my senses back to normalcy. I dressed up and snatched a packet of muffins from the cupboard and dumped it in my bag. I took the keys and started digging my drawer for a pair of socks. Struggling hard to find one I removed my slippers and left them near the sofa. I didnt have an option but to wear the already worn out chappals. I looked behind to give a final glance at the house before locking it shut. I loaded my shoulder with my black six stringer and flipped my carry bag alongside with its belt coming right across my torso. I pulled the door shut and stepped out in the dark.
I walked the bumpy road, with shrill dullness as thousand thoughts cut through my mind. The road to make the band was so relevant to that road which I was treading. I walked the lane which was shrouded with bellowing darkness and my feet rubbed harshly to the uneven mixture of gravel and sand giving out the typical rugged sounds. I remembered the time when the band was just a thought and from that little dream to making it possible was such an effort. As I walked with my shadow falling right in front of me I could see the reflection of all that I had sacrificed for making it happen. That cold morning I realised how uncertain the future was. I didnt know where this journey would end. And how long will it make me walk. But the fact remains that the band did come up, it did shine, it did make its way, through the hoard of other bands. It was an accomplishment of sorts. As I reached the end of the by-lane and halted a cab to head me off to the station, I knew this was worth giving a shot. The band had seen so much, but it stood strong. Because it had a purpose and the purpose is... that you never give up. You never let go. Things happen and you can make them happen. Even through the darkness 'We' walked. The journey has begun but its far from over and I wont quit. I wont stop walking. I wont look back, eventhough the road is bumpy and dusty it still has given me a way. My way. Coshish.

Every note that we ever played, every song that we ever made, every fuck-up that we detested, it was worth it. And I knew, at that very point when I was on my way to the station, there would be someone, somwhere, conceptualising a new dream, that would be worth a try. And I hoped he would make the worthy choice. He would not let go of it, but grab it with both hands and realise it. Because there are somethings that we do as they have a reason, some, because they are obligations, while there are a few things that we do because we are responsible but there are only a handful of things that we do not because they have a reason or obligation or responsibility, but because thats what we love to do, thats where the passion flows in, thats where reasoning ends and freedom begins. I have no reason why I did Coshish, I had no expectations from it, I dont have a logical explanation as to why did I sacrifice so many things for it. All I can say is that, I am glad that I did it. And after all that people say after listening to it, all the opinions good, bad or ugly, are things set in motion by it. Honestly, you dont care, because you know what you have created is not synthetic congregation of notes or random accumulation of words but it is every drop of passion that you could ever collect and punch it in a song. Thats as simple as it gets. The mixture of passion, love, freedom, fear and fire drips down like a droplet into one creation.
For anyone who might come across this, look inside of you and see where is that small dream lying. Find it, something that you always wanted to do but you let it go for things more sane but those that you never did like or enjoy. Its just one life, and you have that one dream, give it one shot, and see.... The road is bad and bumpy but its a road which has a way... Take it.

Fire

the waves subside
and i hide in my cocoon
the silence starts to squeal
the empty rooms fill

i look around and see images
yet to happen but foreseen
in my cocoon
i wait. patience.

then she comes in
the patience pays
she walks in
like a soldier who has all seen

then it ends
and the game begins
i rise and break
the cocoon from within

i guide her into the chamber
of the newfound castle
we move into the box
the surprises will unfold

as we lay under the pseudo sky
yet to begin as we lie
in the mist of her fragrance
the purity soars and converge

time splits and vacates
million thoughts in me rage
we dive together
behold. the sacred sin's begun

shapes cut through the darkness
sense and smell guide
then i cut her into half
and fill her with mine

she rises high
under the pseudo sky
where i fill her
for what i missed

she surrenders
my new found slave
for the stimulus
and the tender whiplash

she gives in
at the highest point
but tries to hide
all in vain. a slave atlast

i rise again
like a phoenix so pure
the fire burns again
as she begins to crave

the veins filled now
with love obscure
passion drives within
her moans belowing

i complete the circle
not to begin
the soldier she was
witnessed the unseen

she is till warm
with the fire i unleashed
trying to negate and hold
her fragile frail

the phoenix subsides
lost and cold
trail of ashes and dust
lay where the fire began

back into the cocoon
from where it rose
waiting again to unfold
patience. i wait.